mallowhallow | 1st fight | Audio | Highcrest -> Whitewood

--ast it, what's the command to start? I said start already so--oh. Right.

*Why is this text to audio? Because he activated a extra accessory in his tech scroll? Because his device is smart enough to realize it's dealing with an idiot? Who can tell?*

Bet a lotta ya ain't up to hearing a sob story or a question about seein friends, huh? Gleamed a bit of this network stuff--pretty weird. Last I saw, computers couldn't do nothing but make flag waving images. Anyway, I think I got something most of you want:

A clue.

So none o'these native folks are especially talkative about this place, right? Well in my exploring, I ran across some weirdoes of varying sizes in some trees. Looked like fairies, so I guess they're fairies. That's not important.

The fact they're hostile? Totally important. Only people with somethin' to hide get that angry about an innocent guy mindin' their own business. But, see, there just so happens to be a lot of the big and lil buggers. So whaddaya say? Help a guy form an interrogation party to uncover what they know so we can blow this popsicle stand.

Stop. Tch, that'll learn those lousy brats--dousin a guy in honey and beez while he's sleepin--

*And the feed ends.*

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Ranma...!?

[ She's... surprisingly happy to see him. Until she processes the rest of his statement. ]

... bees and honey, huh?

[ That'll learn you to sleep near fairies? ...or..perhaps not. ]

Are you seriously going to try to interrogate -fairies-?

*Interrogate?*

*No. That's officially too good for them. Interrogation was more a kindness given to perps that might one day reform. Kidnapping someone's uncute, unsexy, dumpy, brickhouse, no cooking talent fiancee?

That was punishable by genocide.*

Huh? Akane? Great! That means we can poison 'em!

*Orrrr we can just overlook that murderous rage that was on his face all of a split-second before a GREAT idea came to the fore.

Hell yes, biochemical warfare.*

[ That murderous rage? Must have been her imagination, because it was there and gone way too quickly. And wait... ]

Poison them? What are you talking about?

Look, are you anywhere near a big kitchen?

Edited 2013-03-14 23:39 (UTC)

There's a kitchen in the house I'm staying in- it's not all that big though, why?

Cause Imma need a feast. A big feast. HUGE.

R...Really? [ He must be FAMISHED. ANd he wants to eat her cooking! Oh GLORIOUS, FRABJOUS day. ]

Ranma...!

O..Okay! I mean - I don't have much but I can get some ingredients and whip up a big dinner.

[ Which will be a total disaster. ]

Oh man, yer a total life-saver, Akane! This'll definitely get 'em to see the light!

*Yeah, he's a dead man.*

[ It's really just a matter of time now. He's gone and sealed his fate! But for the moment, she looks just absolutely delighted-- or did until the latter statement. Now she just looks confused, though the smile doesn't vanish yet. ]

W..wait... "them"? .... them who?

I thought ...

Y'know, the fairies. They'll love it.

*The look of someone who thought Akane was following along fine with this conversation.*

... the... the fairies?

You idiot... I thought you were talking about wanting food for -YOU-.

Why would I make something for the fairies?

Because it'll get them to cooperate or they have t'face the awful consequences.

*To his credit his brain is finally catching up to his mouth and realizing he should be ducking right now. Thank god for long-distances.*

[ Thank god is right. That look of rage is just barely held in check as she picked up on what he was implying. ]

Awful consequences?

What? Don't tell me y'went and got good while I wasn't lookin?

[ A long pause in which she is mentally picturing the beatdown Ranma would be getting right about now if he were in front of her. ]

Ranma, you ... [ And to think she'd actually been happy to see him here! ]

You are such a JERK. [ She knows her cooking is bad, but you don't have to rub it in by threatening to feed the fairies and poison them. She should show him. She could make a lunch box fit for a KING and bring it to where he is, and the fairies would eat it and love it and he'd miss out! ... actually it's more likely that she'd ruin it in her rage and distraction, feed it, poison the fairies and then the ones not sick would attack -again-. :I ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO DEAL WITH THAT SAOTOME? ]

*No one will understand the instinctive shiver he'd just given off. Well, no one who doesn't also get what phantom pain is all about.*

Aw c'mon, what'd I do!? *That implies an intelligence level prominent enough to actually predict such a tragedy that will no doubt fall all on him like a house of heavy brick cards.*

[ HOW CAN HE BE SO DENSE. Okay - Akane, Breathe. Calm down. Count to 100. ]

... Forget it. [ GRR. She glances away, irked by -something- all right, but she looks back after a moment. ] Fine, I'll make something. Where are you?

Great! I'm in these dinky fairy woods! Yer th'best, Akane! Man this'll be a new step toward diplomacy and it's all yer doing!

*Can't hear danger warnings over the sound of his own ego.*

[ So one minute you're insulting her cooking, and the next you're praising her. Is it any wonder how she gets confused about you sometimes? You are such a weird friend. But the danger of hurricane Akane passes, as she smiles slightly. Aw. ]

... Give me twenty minutes, okay? I'll be there as soon as I can. [ What to make, what to make? And hey, she'll make a little extra for Ranma too while she's at it. ]

Edited 2013-03-20 23:08 (UTC)

*Calm before the storm, honestly. Calm right before the chaos and wreckage of sad lives that strive to rebuild from absolutely.*

Perfect. I'll be makin' some firewood till then!

*Which he will. Not that the fae will appreciate it--chopping down ANY tree in their wood? The audacity of this human knows no bounds. He'll have to be dealt with. Soon.

But that's later. Now is someone honing their skills on unsuspecting dead trees. Which become logs. Which become smaller stocks of kindling.*

[ And twenty minutes later, Akane's whipped up a quick meal - two actually, one for the fairies, and one for her foot-in-the-mouth-not-fiancee. She's too nice for you, Ranma. you should be more grateful. ]

Ranma! [ Yeah that audacity. Boundless. She'd groan about the chopping of trees, but she'll save it for an 'I told you so' only not really since she never actually said anything about messing with the fairies. ]

1st fight | Audio | Highcrest -> Whitewood

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3/3, video function

video function - oH My god Ranma no :D

What it's in his contract. 83

FFGh XD True. :D

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--/BEATS BACK WORK. TIME FOR TAGS. 8D

/helps beat work back! <3

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